31: Orange you glad I didn't say Paranoid.

Michael enters Janet’s apartment. He rushes into the kitchen. He opens the refrigerator door. He scans viciously.

Michael: Come on. Where are you? Where the fuck are you?

The telephone rings. Michael dashes to answer it and leaves the fridge door open. He looks for a caller ID, but there is none. He puts his hand out to answer and then recoils –thinking better of it. The phone continues to ring and ring. Michael runs around the apartment, tearing it apart. He looks under cushions on the couch and all around the room. He knocks things over and sweat appears on his brow. The place becomes a shambles. After awhile, Michael collapses on the couch. Almost a minute later, Janet enters.

Michael: (jumping up) Hi, hon. Janet.

Janet: Michael. What happened?

Michael: I’ve been going crazy. I need to find something.

Janet: What?

Michael: Wait. Why are you home?

Janet: Nobody bought this afternoon and Carol sent me home. Well first she asked me to come over and I said: No. I kind of shouted it in her face –like this: No! I didn’t mean to yell at her, but it just slipped out. She said that that was okay and then I left. We have to go eat some dessert at Paula’s anyway.

Michael: Not till tonight. Anyway. . .umm Janet. I’m looking for something very important.

Janet: What?

Michael: That orange I brought home.

Janet: What about it?

Michael: I want to eat it. I’m very hungry.

Janet: What orange?

Michael: You know that-

Janet: I remember now. I-

Michael: Yeah? Yeah?

Janet: This place is really a mess. Did you need it that badly?

Michael: Yes, I just- want- an orange. . . I really.

Janet: I-

Michael: What? What did you do with it?

The telephone begins ringing again.

Michael: Just a second. Tell me first.

Janet: I gave it to Paula for breakfast.

Michael: Did she eat it? Did she?

Janet: I don’t know. Why is an orange so important to you?

Michael: Nevermind.

The telephone continues to ring.

Janet: Michael. I have to get the phone.

Michael: Go ahead. (He slumps down onto the couch.)

Janet: Hello? Oh. Yes. Hold on.

Michael: What?

Janet: It’s for you.

Michael: For me?

Janet: Yeah.

Michael: Who is it?

Janet: I don’t know.

Michael: But it’s not your father.

Janet: No. It’s not.

Michael: (taking the phone) Hello?

Toby: Man. We’re in deep.

Michael: Why are you calling me here?

Toby: Bud, it’s an emergency.

Michael: What?

Toby: The orange is gone and my shower curtain has been dismantled.

Michael: So?

Toby: So?! Somebody was here when we were here.

Michael: You know who it is.

Toby: Who?

Michael: Need I even say it?

Toby: Is Janet there?

Michael: Yes.

Toby: Well you know what we have to do then.

Michael: Ummm. Not sure, but I’ll be down to work in just a bit. Thanks for letting me know. Good-bye.

He hangs up the phone. Janet looks frightened.

Janet: What’s going on?

Michael: Nothing.

Janet: I’m scared.

Michael: Why?

Janet: Your face looks mad.

Michael: I’m not mad.

Janet: I thought you were because I gave the orange to-

Michael: Well, I did want to eat it, but I’m not that mad.

Janet: Why did you wreck the apartment?

Michael: I was really hungry.

Janet: Michael. Who was that?

Michael: Work. I’m getting called in. They need some extra guys.

Janet: You look so tired.

Michael: I am tired. I’ll be home later.

Janet: Don’t forget we have to go to Paula’s tonight!

Michael: I won’t. I can’t wait to see her.

Janet: Good.

Michael: You don’t have to clean all this up. I’ll do it when I get back.

Janet: Okay. Bye.

Michael: Bye. (He exits.)

Janet: Love you.