15: Telephone Tag 1

The Volunteer Firefighter Station of the County. Michael enters. Some firemen are working on a truck in the background. A counter stands just inside the door and a bored looking man sits behind it.

Man: Can I help you?

Michael: Sure. My name is Michael Andreas and- I’d like to be on the volunteer department?

Man: Let me get you an application.

Michael: Thanks.

Man: Here you go.

Michael begins filling it out.

Man: We are really in need of some guys around here. Do you have another job?

Michael: No.

Man: Do you know how much you can lift?

Michael: Lift?

Man: Yeah, weight as in lifting up.

Michael: I used to be able to bench 170 in high school, but it’s been while.

Man: You’ll be fine. We need guys like I said.

Michael: Sweet.

Man: You filling in all your information?

Michael: Yeah.

Man: Good. Address, phone number, all that stuff?

Michael: Yeah.

Man: Don’t worry about previous employment. We don’t care. We need guys. Just gimme here.

Michael: Here you go.

Man: Now when can you start?

Michael: Immediately.

Man: How available are you?

Michael: Completely.

Man: You got the job. Ha ha. I bet you never thought it’d be this easy, huh?

Michael: Not really.

Man: Hold on. I’ll take you on a tour. I just gotta get my keys.

The phone rings.

Man: Fire department. Yeah?

Paula’s Office at the Beverly Judith Berry House.

Paula: Hi. My name is Paula Pluckston and I’m a case worker at the Beverly Judith Berry House.

Man: Yeah? Your house on fire?

Paula: No, I’m calling to ask if a Michael is employed there as a volunteer?

Man: What’s his last name?

Paula: I don’t know.

Man: Well we don’t- wait- hold on. (to Michael) What did you say your name was?

Michael: Michael.

Man: It’s for you. (He hands him the phone.)

Michael: Hello?

Paula: Michael?

Michael: Yes, who is this?

Paula: It’s Paula.

Michael: (self-satisfied) Hi, Paula. What can I do you for?

Paula: I didn’t think I’d actually talk to you.

Michael: You didn’t? Who did you think that you’d speak to?

Paula: Your supervisor. . .not you.

Michael: But you got me. Why are you calling here?

Paula: Well. . .funny thing. . .

Michael: Yes? I’m waiting.

Paula: I was just filling out some subsidy paperwork for Janet and I need to put down your financial status and I realized, that I don’t know any of your information. I didn’t know how to get a hold of you and-

Michael: You can reach me at Janet’s place. I moved in already.

Paula: I can reach you there? Already?

Michael: That’s what I said, didn’t I?

Paula: Can’t we be friends, Michael?

Michael: Of course. I can stop down by your work later in the afternoon to help you with the paper work.

Paula: That’s no trouble. I wouldn’t trouble you like that. I can get it now.

Michael: But Paula, I’m working. You took the trouble to call me here. . . I can take the trouble to drive over. Janet showed me where the house is. She even pointed out your car. I know where it’s parked. . .

Paula: Ummm. . .okay.

Michael: Just letting you know that I’ll find you later today.

Paula: Do you know around what time?

Michael: Probably later in the afternoon around one. I’m done here at noon.

Paula: Oh good. We can have a long nice chat.

Michael: I would like that.

Paula: As would I. Oh I’m getting another call. I’ll have to let you go, Michael.

Michael: You can call me, Mike, Ms. Pluckston. Everyone does.

Paula: Janet doesn’t.

Michael: She will, with time. Have a good afternoon.

Paula: Good bye. (clicks over) Hello?

Man: Come on, buddy. Let’s go give you an alibi tour.

Michael: An alibi tour?

Man: Most of the guys that work here come to get away from their wives. Once this tour is over, you’ll know this place so well. . .you can explain to your wife that you have worked here as long as you have said you did.

Michael: Right.

Michael and Man exit.

At the Co-op grocery store. Paul is on the phone.

Paul: Is this Paula Pluckston?

Paula: Speaking.

Paul: This is Paul Townsend. You don’t know me. I know from my fiancée that you are a social worker?

Paula: Yes. That’s correct. How can I help you?

Paul: I’m not sure. I’m asking for some advice. I think my fiancée has a problem.

Paula: What would it be?

Paul: She can never ever be in public and if she is she frets and frets and stews about what is to happen to her. It’s gotten to be so bad that she is afraid of everybody.

Paula: Really? Well Paul, I’m glad that you got my name from your fiancée, but I just don’t give out free counseling. This is my profession. You’ll have to schedule an appointment to meet with me. Would you like to do some couples counseling?

Paul: I guess I’ll have to speak to my fiancée. . .she doesn’t know that I called.

Paula: It’s best to be honest with your wife, but I’d be more than happy to do that if it’s something you both agree on. What’s your wife’s name?

Paul: Fiancee. . .not wife. . .but her name is Wendy.

Paula: I don’t know any Wendys offhand. But call me back if I can be of any assistance.

Paul: Thanks.

Paula: Your welcome. Have a great day.

Paul: Good-bye.

Paula: Bye. (She hangs up and dials.) Hello?

Nurse: (on the other end) County Clinic, Deborah speaking.

Paula: Hi, could I speak to Dr. Windhover? This is Paula Pluckston.

Nurse: Dr. Windhover is in surgery right now. Can I take a message?

Paula: No, just have him call, Paula Pluckston at his earliest convenience. He should have my number.

Nurse: Okay. Thank you.

Paula: Bye. Bye. (Hangs up and dials)

At the Fruit Stand. Janet organizes fruit. Carol answers her cell phone.

Carol: Hello?

Paula: Hello.

Carol: Who is this?

Paula: Paula Pluckston. We met yesterday.

Carol: Oh yeah. You want to talk to Janet?

Paula: Yes, I would.

Carol: Please don’t make it too long.

Paula: Oh I won’t. Don’t worry. I know how precious your money is.

Carol: Here she is.

Janet: Hello?

Paula: Janet?

Janet: Hi, Paula!

Paula: I was wondering this afternoon if you’d like to go to the library with me.

Janet: Sure. But you know I was never any good at reading.

Paula: No, I want to take you to look at the wedding books.

Janet: Yeah, we can do that. Let’s do that. That sounds like fun.

Paula: Sounds good. I will call your phone at home when I am coming to pick you up. It’ll be around five. Does that sound like a good time?

Janet: Yeah!

Carol: (off) How did she get my number?

Paula: Tell her it was on the application for your employment. She wrote it in her own handwriting.

Janet: It was on the application she said. You wrote it down.

Carol: Oh. Well hurry up. We’re gonna be busy.

Janet: I have to go.

Paula: I understand. Have a good day!

Janet: You too. Bye.

Paula: Bye.

At the station.

Man: Thus concludes our tour. I had Manny type this up in the back. It’ll be the days when you are on call.

Michael: Sweet. Thanks.

A cell phone rings.

Michael: I have to take this. Thanks again. You are a life saver. (answering) Hello?

Toby: Where the fuck is all your stuff?

Michael: I told you. We’re in this now. We have to keep going.

Toby: Where did you go, man?

Michael: I’m living at Janet’s house.

Toby: (getting it) I’m proud of you man. You are taking this seriously. We aren’t going to be sorry.

Michael: Yeah, I hope not.

Toby: Look, I gotta call that Wanda chick back. She’s a little paranoid schizo. . .but I think she’s loaded.

Michael: Okay. What are you doing for her?

Toby: Hardly anything. I got her some stuff. Kind of weird requests, but whatever. Anyway, I guess I won’t see you tonight.

Michael: Nope.

Toby: Fine then fucker! Check ya later. Bye. (He hangs up. But then calls another number.)

The Andreas Living Room.

Judy: Hello?

Toby: Hey.

Judy: (disguising) Hey. What is it, an emergency? I told you never to call me.

Toby: I wanna know what’s going on. Are you happy?

Judy: Yeah. I figured out my price. Five hundred dollars.

Toby: The stuff was 250. I want a thousand.

Judy: A thousand!

Toby: That stuff wasn’t cheap, bitch.

Judy: Fine. Fine. But it’s going to take me awhile to get it. I have to go. I’ll call you later.

Toby: Don’t wait too long.

Judy: I won’t.

Toby: That’s a warning.

Judy: I got it. (She hangs up. She goes into the kitchen where she is cooking a roast. She has a knife and she cuts the roast down the middle. She takes the one half and then gets out the brown bottle from the kitchen. She also removes a syringe from the bag. Kitty enters unbeknownst to her.)

Kitty: What are you doing?

Judy: Mommy’s cooking Daddy’s dinner. (She injects one half of the meat with the syringe.)

Kitty: Smells good.

Judy: That’s good. Mommy made it. Now go away. Shoo. Shoo. (She begins to dial another number.)

At Goode’s Chocolate Executive Head-quarters. Cindy, Alfred’s Secretary, answers.

Cindy: (awkward) Hello, Goode’s Chocolate Company, Cindy speaking.

Judy: Hi. Is my husband there?

Cindy: Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Judy: Oh, what?

Cindy: Oh. He’s not in right now.

Judy: Oh.

Cindy: Can I take ummm oh, ooo a message?

Judy: Sure you can take ummm oh oooo a message.

Cindy: What is it? I have a pen ready.

Judy: Tell him on his way home to pick up another of those plug strips for the kitchen. He’ll know what I mean. I’m trying to cook a roast for our family. . .

Cindy: Oh Judy, I didn’t know you cooked.

Judy: You know my name?

Cindy: Well, you are Alfred’s. . .well anyway. . .you know . . .and he does talk about you-

Judy: Good. I hope you keep that in your mind.

Cindy: Every once in a great while. Oh. Oh. I will. Oh yes.

Judy: Just have him call me ASAP.

Cindy: Fine. Oh. Okay. Have a nice ummmmm day. See you later. Oooo.

Judy: Bye.

Cindy hangs up. Alfred comes out from under her desk.

Alfred: I’m not taking anymore calls today. I don't feel well. I hope that was a nice lunchtime afternoon.

Cindy: I can’t wait until dinner. Judy said she’s making something though.

Alfred: Oh, see, now she’s trying. Too bad it’s too late.

Cindy: Yeah. Too bad. (Laughs) You have the tongue of a 35 year old, Alfie.

Alfred: Don’t call me that, call me, ummm what else goes with Alfred?

Cindy: Freddie? Does Freddie go?

Alfred: Sure, call me Freddie, baby doll.

The telephone rings.

Cindy: Hello, Goode’s Chocolate Company, Cindy speaking. Oh. Oh. Yes. It’s for you.

Alfred: I told you no more calls.

Cindy: But it’s your son.

Alfred: Send it to my office.